I wonder if this is the right time to tell you something I’ve been meaning to mention for a long time. I consider you to be a true friend–the kind of friend who can tell you something like, “you have bad breath,” or, “that shirt is not flattering,” and your feelings wouldn’t get hurt, because you know I love you unconditionally.
But I’ve held back on this one, because it’s not one of those things you can change easily, and frankly, you’ve been a bit fragile lately. Maybe because you’re crossing an age chasm. My thinking, though, is that I can take refuge behind the blog and just post it here so I don’t have to see your face when I break this to you. Also, maybe your other loved ones on the blog will rush to your emotional rescue, should you need it.
Ok, here it is.
You have back hair.
And arm hair.
And neck hair.
I think I once saw some hair follicles on your retina.
I have a vague recollection of your ass running into a very cold lake, and yes, you have ass hair.
Now, there are products that can take care of these things. My husband, too, has just about as much hair–one of our favorite games over the years has been to guess who has a higher follicle count–but it doesn’t bother me, so we’ve chosen to live with it. I just wonder if you’ve ever asked Teresa whether she has any needs related to your hair.
I think that’s the most loving thing a friend can do for her friend on his 40th birthday. Oh, and let me add that you are probably the most quick-witted, intellectually curious, loyal, passionate, deep and sensitive man I know, I’ve always loved your smile and your laugh (and your hair), and I’m grateful for the devoted friendship you’ve generously given me, Mike and the boys for so many years.
Happy 40th Birthday!